It has been weeks since my mother’s passing. I know it’s somehow not acceptable by social standards that I am still shedding tears. But, it’s just that I had this special connection with her, that up until now I cannot fathom that she really is gone.
Last night, I had another dream of my mother. Since her passing, I’ve had many dreams of her. Mostly were happy moments, the moments we have had together as a family or the moments we could have had if she was still here. But last night was different, it was more vivid than usual. It was like she really was there and I fit perfectly in the scene. This time, however, her mood was serious. Her words went this way,
NJ, anak, I am departing the Earth to be at peace with our Father in Heaven. Thank you for everything you have done for your brothers and the whole family. I am so proud and thankful. I love you all. Pass on my love to your Tatay and brothers Emmanuel, and Angelo. Remember that I will always be with you in spirit.
It has finally dawned on me that I should let her go. We should all let her spirit free. I said my goodbyes and said a prayer to the Lord, before reality came back to my senses and…
I woke up…
..with Tears on a Pillow..
…Tears on my Pillow.